Exactly a month ago, I wrote a post about five things you should not say to a gay child. See http://www.straightparentgaykid.blogspot.com/2015/07/10/-five-things-not-to-say-to-your-gay-child/
Since then, I have either heard or read about common remarks (malapropos) that may not be intended as insensitive, but come across that way.

“That’s So Gay!”  School kids, in particular, hear this all the time, according to GLSEN (Gay, Straight, Education Network). They don’t need to hear it at home, too! The phrase can be translated to that’s inferior!  You don’t want to apply this to anyone, gay or straight.

You were just dating Johnny!” Some gays and lesbians know they are gay as youngsters, some realize their orientation when they hit puberty, still some don’t know until they are adults.  There is no right age for coming out.  Most gays/lesbians, probably hoping they were cisgender or heterosexual  have probably dated the opposite sex, at some point in their lives.

“You’re Too Young To Know!” If your child tells you he/she is gay, believe them.  They have the feelings toward the same-sex, you don’t. Even if they think they’re gay because they are experimenting with the same-sex, as straight persons do, and they could be mistaken, don’t correct them.  Time will tell!

So, Now You’re Bisexual!” Bisexuality gets a bum rap.
The straight population erroneously thinks it means you’re promiscuous because you’re engaging in sex with both males and females.  Society wants the bisexual to choose to be either straight or gay.  But truth is, there does exist bisexuality as a sexual orientation.

“You need to go to church more!” You can’t “pray-the-gay” away. Reparative or conversion therapy doesn’t work – in fact, a few states have outlawed it.  It usually makes the gay person feel worse, resulting in low self-esteem, guilt, and even suicide.  It is a temporary fix that is caused by bullying, usually from religious organizations.

When Your Child is Gay

When Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To Know

For more detailed advice, see book, co-authored with a mother of a gay son and a psychiatrist, Jonathan L. Tobkes, M.D.

Wesley Cullen Davidson

Wesley Cullen Davidson is an award-winning freelance writer and journalist specializing in parenting as well as gay and lesbian content. For the past two years, Wesley has concentrated almost exclusively on the lesbian and gay community, specifically on advising straight parents of gay children on how to be better parents and raise happy, well-adjusted adults

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