Dear Kaitlyn,
I’ve been riveted to your case for months now.  I don’t have a “Free Kaitlyn” T-shirt or decal for my car to prove it, but I was horrified to learn that because, you, as a eighteen year-old, had sex with a minor, 14, now 15, that you could have gone to prison for up to fifteen years, and been labelled a sexual predator!Your profile does not fit one of a sexual predator or “perp” (as Law and Order televison show would have it!)
Your Charges
Kids like you are having sex in high school, gasp, even in middle school. You claim to be in love with the victim, a fifteen-year-old, a basketball teammate, but we never hear from the victim, only her parents who went to the sheriff’s office to press charges against you.  Your victim’s parents told the Sheriff’s office that you two had sex in the Sebastian River High School bathroom (not cool!).  What were you thinking?  You might as well have made love on the football field with spectators packed in the bleachers!  The parents also said their daughter ran away from home to your house where she stayed.  This is called “interfering with parental custody,”another strike against you.
Victim in Therapy
I don’t know if you’re a lesbian for life or just experimenting.  Obviously, your love interest is unhappy at home.  According to the local paper, she is in therapy.  I don’t know if this is a form of conversion therapy on the parent’s part to make their daughter straight or whether you really messed up her head.  Your parents claim that the victim’s parents knew that you were dating.
Your Parents Accept Your Gayness
Your parents don’t seem to have a problem with you’re being a practicing lesbian and have taken to the Internet ( to garner signatures  (well over 200,000 to date) to get sympathizers for your case and have it reduced to a misdemeanor. Your father, divorced from your mother, has also raised money on the Internet (“go fund me”) for your defense fund. Your parents believe that the judges involved in your case are homophobic, yet if you receive misdemeanors, instead of felony charges for lewd and lascivious battery charges and interfering with parental custody, your case will be similar to two precedent ones of heterosexual high school students in the same county. They received misdemeanors for having sex with underage victims.  But they also obeyed the judge’s orders.
No Touch the i-pod Touch
Your defense team turned down an earlier plea offer for a child abuse charge.  However, you and your mother have violated the conditions of your pretrial release.  Big time.  You were told not to have contact with the victim on February 17th, yet sent over two dozen pornographic shots of yourself on March 7th and April 3rd to the victim.  You gave the victim an i-pod Touch in March and sent over 20,000 text messages to your girlfriend.  Your mother is acting like an accomplice and told the victim to delete the text messages.  You, your mother, and if the victim deletes the messages, are flaunting your entitlement!
Risky Business
During your senior year in high school you were a honor student, an athlete, a cheerleader, yet you still could go to jail.  I read in the newspaper this morning that you second plea deal keeping you out of jail has been withdrawn. The attorney for the underage victim told News Channel 5  that the prosecution withdrew the plea deal offer owing to the violation of your pretrial release. 
Now, with no plea deal being offered, you’re facing felony charges, jail time, and could become a registered sex offender if convicted.  Tomorrow afternoon you have a hearing.  God help you!

When Your Child is Gay

When Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To Know

For more detailed advice, see book, co-authored with a mother of a gay son and a psychiatrist, Jonathan L. Tobkes, M.D.

Wesley Cullen Davidson

Wesley Cullen Davidson is an award-winning freelance writer and journalist specializing in parenting as well as gay and lesbian content. For the past two years, Wesley has concentrated almost exclusively on the lesbian and gay community, specifically on advising straight parents of gay children on how to be better parents and raise happy, well-adjusted adults

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